Sex?
I have been talking about writing a book for some time. More than a few have said I should. However, procrastination and laziness have always combined to curtail any serious notions of actually writing the book. This blog should change that. At least, I hope it will. The only problem in doing it this way is that I can kiss those millions good-bye.
One of the topics I wanted to cover in the book was relationships; romantic ones. The, find-your-life-mate ones. And a big part of relationships is something no one ever thinks about. You know... sex.
Here's my sex advice to every teen who might bother to read this blog: don't do it. Stay faaaar away from it. And, in case you didn't catch it, DON'T DO IT.
Don't get me wrong. Sex is great. It's the most fun you can have with your body accompanied by another (some do it alone, but that's a whooole nother topic). At least, I think it is. I'm sure there are those out there who might think differently. But, for me, nothing else comes to mind.
My partner mentioned it's also closest you can get to another person (physically). That's true too. There's really no other way to get as close as you get (again, we're talking physically), than being intimate with another person. When it's combined with the right emotions, it's completely amazing.
But, there's a catch.
It can consume you. It can be addicting. It can lead you into relationships that are destructive. It can be misinterpreted as love. It's the last that's the most dangerous. All too often, people mistake lust for love. That, is a true tragedy. Because, as I've recently learned, there's a vast difference between lust and love.
I need to say that again... There is a vast difference between lust and love.
The irony, for me, is that I've always confused the two. It led to my being involved in a marriage for far longer than I should have been. It is also one of the major causes for the destruction of the marriage. I misinterpreted lust for love. Sex was the end-all, be-all for me. That drive for sex caught me in a relationship that bore children, and ruined who I was.
Now, I face the task of extricating myself from said marriage. Three children will be damaged. Hell, they already are; bad marriages have a way of hurting kids. It will wound those around me. It will have life-long affects that I can't even anticipate at this moment.
That's not good.
Ironically, I'm now involved in a relationship that is based on friendship and love. That's how it started; she and I became friends. Best friends. Then, somewhere along the way, we fell in love. It has been completely amazing. I've never known anyone like this woman. She makes me a better person (yes, I know that's cliche). When I'm with her, the world is a better place.
But, it's the results of the previous infatuation with sex that cause problems with this relationship. I have kids. She's not interested in becoming a surrogate mother. I have an ex, and am trying to get a divorce. It affects her more than she lets on.
So, the time that I manage to get lucky enough to find The One, there's a fair chance I could lose it... All because of sex.
Something to think about...
One of the topics I wanted to cover in the book was relationships; romantic ones. The, find-your-life-mate ones. And a big part of relationships is something no one ever thinks about. You know... sex.
Here's my sex advice to every teen who might bother to read this blog: don't do it. Stay faaaar away from it. And, in case you didn't catch it, DON'T DO IT.
Don't get me wrong. Sex is great. It's the most fun you can have with your body accompanied by another (some do it alone, but that's a whooole nother topic). At least, I think it is. I'm sure there are those out there who might think differently. But, for me, nothing else comes to mind.
My partner mentioned it's also closest you can get to another person (physically). That's true too. There's really no other way to get as close as you get (again, we're talking physically), than being intimate with another person. When it's combined with the right emotions, it's completely amazing.
But, there's a catch.
It can consume you. It can be addicting. It can lead you into relationships that are destructive. It can be misinterpreted as love. It's the last that's the most dangerous. All too often, people mistake lust for love. That, is a true tragedy. Because, as I've recently learned, there's a vast difference between lust and love.
I need to say that again... There is a vast difference between lust and love.
The irony, for me, is that I've always confused the two. It led to my being involved in a marriage for far longer than I should have been. It is also one of the major causes for the destruction of the marriage. I misinterpreted lust for love. Sex was the end-all, be-all for me. That drive for sex caught me in a relationship that bore children, and ruined who I was.
Now, I face the task of extricating myself from said marriage. Three children will be damaged. Hell, they already are; bad marriages have a way of hurting kids. It will wound those around me. It will have life-long affects that I can't even anticipate at this moment.
That's not good.
Ironically, I'm now involved in a relationship that is based on friendship and love. That's how it started; she and I became friends. Best friends. Then, somewhere along the way, we fell in love. It has been completely amazing. I've never known anyone like this woman. She makes me a better person (yes, I know that's cliche). When I'm with her, the world is a better place.
But, it's the results of the previous infatuation with sex that cause problems with this relationship. I have kids. She's not interested in becoming a surrogate mother. I have an ex, and am trying to get a divorce. It affects her more than she lets on.
So, the time that I manage to get lucky enough to find The One, there's a fair chance I could lose it... All because of sex.
Something to think about...
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